The diet is restricted and there are many hours spent in the gym and many more hours spent "zoning out" - anyone who has gone through it knows what I mean by this, that time spent where you barely know what planet you are on. Sometimes you don't know how you did whatever it was you just did- how did I drive here? (yup...seriously), how did I just go through my day? When people ask you how your weekend was - it stops you in your tracks because for the life of you, you can't remember there even being a weekend.
But it is all worth it. So incredibly worth it.
To step out on that stage, under the lights, and show off all that hard work, to strut your stuff and for a few brief minutes be one helluva diva!
I love it - I can't help it! The offseason is fun - indulging in foods that you only get for that brief time period, lifting weights heavier than last season - being stronger than ever before and feeling powerful in your movement, but there is fun in season too. As the competitions get closer you feel little by little weaker, the amount of work you can do in the gym varies more and you find yourself dragging yourself , well, everywhere. But you still do it, you still put that time in on the cardio machines, you still do all those reps and never settle for second best. You do what you possibly can do, leave nothing to chance - because in the end it's a judged sport. You can't control your competitor, you can't control the judging, but you sure as hell can give it your best shot!
I sit here just under 11 weeks out from my next competition. I constantly battle with myself that I'm where I should be. I want to be leaner already, but coach keeps me grounded and sane. It's all part of the game - everyone sees what we put on stage but the true sport is what you do daily. Everyday you push yourself to the limits of what your body can handle. Everyday you say no to indulgence, no to normal, and yes to rallying up the energy and motivation to exceed your expectations.
I have to admit, part of me loves that tired feeling. It feels like such an accomplishment, when I lay down in bed at night and feel every muscle in my entire body relax because it simply has to is a wonderful feeling. It may hurt at times, aches and pains come and go, but you forget all about them when your name is called to step out into the lights.
And, boy how I love those lights. I got told once, that I need to show more life on stage. I'm too comfortable up there. Truth is, I'm just having fun in that moment, I'm at home on stage. It's funny that this shy little girl grew up to love being in the spotlight.
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